Life Reversal

I begin to wonder what life would be like if you could turn it the other way round. Start life from the day of your funeral, get put into a residential home and have your pension to spend. Then instead of things getting worse, they get better. Your hair starts to grow again, you get your own teeth back and you ditch the zimmer frame. Next you leave the home and start employment on an excellent wage. Although your wages decrease you won’t really care because the only money you need to spend is on alcohol and clothes. After employment you shag your way through university and the work gets easier as you pass from secondary school to junior to infant school. You believe in Santa again. What a fucking treat that would be. Christmas once again becomes great and magical and by now you are even getting spoon fed and your arse wiped for you. Finally when death comes, it comes easily and it isn’t painful at all. After all you will be zero years old and you won’t feel a thing because all you will be is a tiny cell, happily swimming around each day and shrinking into nothing; an ice lolly melting in the sun.